A Sandwell Miscellany!

It is common knowledge - even though he won't come out and say it - that the simpleton from Smethwick who leads [sic] "Sadwell" Council, Darren Cooper, wants to stand for Metro Mayor (after publicly stating there should not actually be a mayor) and so I am now writing his (unauthorised) biography. Please do not hesitate to send information to me via the following email:

cooperbiography@gmail.com

Of course, Darren Cooper himself used public money in a masturbatory masterpiece - a filmed interview about his life and career called "Lie Story". (Sorry, what was that? Oh I see - it's actually called "Life Story"). But regular readers will know that he has been somewhat more reticent about talking about his disastrous first marriage (the repercussions of which ripple through time such that he did not attend a recent family wedding in Cornwall), the serious accident involving his vehicle outside a Labour Club (where the story is probably more about the cover-up than the incident) and why he told many people he had acquired the money for his house extension via a certain private individual. Hopefully, my biography will be able to put some meat on the bones!

There has been no comment from him yet concerning his sister's council house as featured in my last post.

Of course, the record of Sandwell Council under his "leadership" has been dismal what with the Children's Services catastrophe and multiple land sale scandals etc.

(This is a convenient place for a timely reminder that the closing date for The Skidder's national competition to find "Britain's Thickest Council Leader 2016" is 12 noon on 1st April. Cooper won it the 2015 prize and remains a strong contender to retain his crown this year. Please forward your other nominations asap.)

The would-be mayor may think that being ignorant, illiterate and inarticulate are sound qualifications for the job and. whilst a percentage of Sadwell morons seem to agree, it won't wash in Brum and Solihull. (Mind you - it might be good news for folk in Soho and Vic if and when he abandons them!)

This blog has put up numerous examples of his pathetic Twitter drivel and I shall seek to make sure that these reach a wider audience than the long-suffering folk of Sandwell in the coming weeks. Just in passing, I found another classic from 2014 the other day. As we have seen already, he (a "politician") cannot spell "Thatcherite" and he once accused UKIP of being a "thatch rite party". Here he is again:

Yes old beans, I was beaming at that one....

Readers will know that Darren Cooper can't write his own speeches and blog but someone in the half a million pound a year press office has to do this for him. He also lifts his daily "news" tweets from something that local MP John Spellar puts out. After various warnings, he has tried to clean up his own torrent of Twitter excrement and now lets his troll associates do all the nasty stuff for him. But he is getting itchy fingers of late and his inability to understand how to use apostrophes has become manifest again:

Like many other politicians this half-wit has no shame nor, it seems, memory. Even though he presides over a brutal one-party dictatorship that rolls its tanks over anyone who stands up to it, he had the gall to pass on (as his own) this gem from Spellar the other day:

And then he passed off another Spellar tweet as his own:

....seemingly forgetting that the three laziest MP's in the last Parliament were all Labour and one of them was the Bermondsey resident who purports to "represent" West Bromwich East - yes, Sandwell's Walrus of Lurve himself, Tommy Watson. Even Darren's mate Brian Rickers, the local Unite Regional Organiser, takes to Twitter to call him, "Lazy Tom"!

(Here's the chart showing the expenses-guzzler Watson couldn't be bothered to waddle into Westminster for over half of the votes during the period 2010 - 2015!!!!!!)

Mention of Unite the Union reminds me that there are rumours of some financial irregularity at the WM Regional Office. I did send this email to their press officer yesterday but I have not had the courtesy of a reply:

"THIS IS NOT A PRIVATE & CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATION AND MAY BE USED AS I SEE FIT.

Dear xx xxxxx,

I understand that there has been some financial irregularity at WM Regional Office. Would you care to supply  a statement about this for my blog and for the benefit of Unite members please?

Julian Saunders"

No doubt some Unite members who are forking out their dues may want to follow this up......

Returning to Darren Cooper I will be making a number of revelations about his conduct very shortly but here is one to be going on with. I have not hitherto put this up as it includes my address. Sometime ago, an officer at Sandwell Police called Inspector Rowe pretended to be concerned about my safety noting the number of threats I was receiving. Of course, when I was actually physically threatened on the streets of Oldbury by someone claiming to be one of Cllr Hussain's immediate family nothing was done. (Of course, the young man may have been only pretending to be one of the the Hussain family  but they are well aware of my address anyway and so in for a penny, in for a pound.) New readers will not be aware that Cooper threatened to confront my wife at her place of work for unspecified reasons but, if he does stand for mayor, I wager that not many other candidates will have sent someone a "we know where you live" message/threat via Twitter direct messaging. Needless to say the class dunce could not even spell my name correctly:

And finally..... not only has this deluded egotist no insight as to the total inappropriateness of him being a political "leader" but there are many rumours that he also fancies himself as "a ladies man". Notwithstanding his "official" number of relationships I had discounted this as improbable fiction but, maybe when he sends this sort of lusciously romantic image out, the laydeez of Langley and environs really do go weak at the knees.....

But then perhaps there is something in all of this after all judging by the "interests" section of his Facebook profile screenshotted just two nights ago. Perhaps Sandwell women will have to push lusty Lothario Paul Sandars aside and form an orderly queue!

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