Twitter Troll No 1 - Paul Kerton

"People are tossers" re-tweeted Paul Kerton @paulkerton on 6th July, 2013. This may not, of course, have been an "endorsement" of that sentiment in the wonderful world of Twitter but it does seem to perfectly encapsulate Kerton's warped view of the world.

But first, who is he? On his Twitter account, his LinkedIn entry AND his Google + heading he describes himself as living in "Birmingham" and so I am assuming that it is a different "Paul Kerton" who is shown on the electoral Register as living at xx Hill Top Road, Oldbury - the same address as Sandwell Labour Councillor and, until recently, Chair of Planning, Steven Frear and  also a different person  to the "Paul Kerton" who formally nominated Frear when he was last elected. (Strangely a Land Registry search of the Hill Top Road address does not come up with the house number but simply as "land and buildings on the east side of Hill Top Road". If that does indeed cover number xx then the owner is shown as, er, Sandwell Metropolitan Borough Council. I always thought council housing was based on a "points" system and so  imagine that there must be a Land Registry error here since it seems unlikely high-powered Frear and this other "Paul Kerton" would have been offered council housing in the same property doesn't it?)

"Our" Paul Kerton is the "e-learning Manager at Old Park Primary School, Wednesbury - ie employer Sandwell Metropolitan Borough Council. It is, perhaps, just as well he is not in a teaching role although he does state that since 2011 he has been an active participant in the independent "Code Club" which is designed to teach school pupils how to code. Whether this brings him into contact with what The Turdmeister might call "them poor little kiddies" is unknown. Old Park has its own twitter account but it is certainly to be hoped the pupils are not following @paulkerton where they will be subjected to almost every expletive and slang expression imaginable - "shit", "fuck", "wanker", "bollocks", "blow job"; "dickhead", "tosser", "twat" plus the combo efforts such as "dickhead tosser"; "utter bollocks", "utter wank" - etc etc etc. The word "shit" is used so often as to be commonplace but at the bottom of this blog is a "Fuck Wall" including numerous uses of that word by our Mr K.

I have declined to mention here the numerous highly-offensive re-tweets which feature on Kerton's twitter account save to mention that he did, of course, repeat the infamous and libellous Sally Bercow "Lord McAlpine" tweet.

On 19th May, 2014 Kerton tweeted: "Apparently parents at the place I work have been searching staff names and looking [at] their profiles. That's not creepy at all... :s". Perhaps parents were legitimately concerned that their children might be cross-contaminated by some of Kerton's crazed views eg:

23/06/13 "Many teen excited Zac Efron tweets tonight. Young lads, fear not. Just style yourself a stereotype of a lesbian and you're in"; or

21/07/13 "Teenage girls are fuckin mental. They don't even need to hear music. Just a pretty boy and a hashtag. Knobs." (Bit of a gender bender that one....);

They might also be disturbed at some of his curious comments on the less-abled:

"...she'll call me a mong for saying that..."; "Ok angry Irish girl berating Taylor Swift is hilarious. The girl is obviously a mentalist...."; and "that's like being voted the tallest dwarf".

"Our" Paul Kerton is one of these "kidult" characters. Besides being a technology geek he is obsessed with television and, in particular, Dr Who and some programme called "Lost". But no-one can escape the torrent of bile he pours out via his twitter account - not even "Jesus Fucking Christ" (04/06/13). I have absolutely no idea who most of the people are that he likes to have a go at and have listed below two broad categories ie (1) politicians and (2) others who I assume are supposed to be "celebrities" but I am disinclined to "google" them to find out. There are myriad examples of the people he hates such as TV quiz contestants (eg "Twat.... what a knob head", "thick tit"); Asda; taxi drivers (Birmingham ones in particular); Microsoft (ironic as you will see later); Amey Construction; Currys/PC World, other twitter users (eg "well that just shows how much of a twat you must be then"); Coca Cola - the list goes on and on and on....

Nevertheless, there are one or two gems which need to be quoted more fully. I have no idea who Lord Howell of Guildford(!) is but according to Kerton he "is a massive prick isn't he?".

Again, I don't know who Judith Woods is but apparently she "is an odious hideous bitch isn't she?"

And at least he wasn't working when he snobbishly opined:  "Why the fuck would anyone see Kerry Katona advertising a financial product and think "well that's a good idea"!? #half term musings".

But as "Special K" says in a roundabout way - "Its only when you think back on people when you realise what a arrogant & thunderously selfish self indulgent arsehole they were [sic]".

Politicians

David Cameron - "...a fucking ridiculous fantasist"; "Cocky arrogant arsehole";
Louise Mensch - "She's so fucking stupid....";
Nick Clegg - "..a nasty horrible vicious knob...Scum" & "..the lying prick..." (Yes ok, ok that one may be "fair comment";
Paddy Ashdown - "..the war mongering tory supporting toss pot...";
Grant Shapps - "scumbag...";
Michael Gove - (a rare display of reticence here given, Gove's job at the time) "Do f*** off...";
Francis Maude - "...scum...";
UKIP members - "UKunts";
Alex Salmond - "Genuinely starting to  believe [he] is mentally ill; and
Michael Fabricant - "makes me so angry I just want to pull him up by his hair so he can feel the pain of the roots tearing...".

Despite some professed Labour connections though, Kerton occasionally veers spectacularly "off message":

Ed Miliband - "Tit";
Sion Simon "..arrogant pathetic people like Sion Simon....";
Chuka Umunna - "...you are talking out of your blinkered arse.." (Can an arse be "blinkered"?);
Liam Byrne - "..utterly disgraceful. Shameful. Hang your head in shame.";
Jack Straw - "a patronizing condescending prick...".


Celebrities & Public Figures ?????

Rod Stewart - "Pay your fucking tax Rod";
@askthicke - "what rhymes with fuck off you misogynist?";
Shia LaBeouf - "...a candidate for dick of the year 2014...";
Sir Digby Jones - "..an anti human arsehole...";
James Clapper - "..you reprehensible knob....scum";
@rooshv - "..a massively inadequate prick...";
Tim Sherwood - "He's a Teflon twat";
Toby Stephens - "..cannot act for shit".

Regular readers of The Skidder will know that trolling is specifically condoned by the top officials at Sandwell Council including Head of Legal - £124k per annum - Neeraj Sharma who actually seems to think some of it has high comedic value. It can be of no surprise therefore that lesser mortals like the Headteacher at Old Park, Mrs Adams, and the Chair of the Board of Governors, Mike Fellows, have no qualms in their e-learning Manager (probably quite well paid) tweeting this kind of stuff. Indeed Kerton also runs another twitter account - Paul Kerton @WLCTPaul which proudly displays Old Park's logo on its heading!

But this Kerton character also boasts that he has been involved in the procurement of IT etc systems "in several schools in Sandwell" for Sandwell Council which brings me neatly to Frog Education of Halifax - suppliers of such systems to schools on, presumably, lucrative contracts.

I have yet to research the large number of secondary schools in Sandwell but I am aware that Frog are suppliers to Phoenix Collegiate. I am guessing that there is plenty of opportunity for Frog to supply further services to the secondary school estate in Sandwell.

This is certainly the position with regard to the primary school estate. The Sandwell Council website lists no less than 93 primary schools of which Albert Pritchard, Bleakhouse Junior, Oakham Primary, Tameside Primary, Uplands Manor, Wood Green and (possibly) Blackheath Primary (site down) operate Frog systems of one sort or another.

You won't find the payments Frog are getting on the Sandwell Council payments over £500 list, however, as payments are hidden in the individual school budgets. But Frog seem keen to flog Sandwell Labour more stuff and so it is, presumably, entirely coincidental that a guest speaker at their annual jamboree this year - #frog14 (part-sponsored by, er Microsoft) - was none-other than that fine upstanding user of social media, er, Paul Kerton of Old Park Primary School! No doubt also a great ambassador for the Frog "Brand".

And finally, our man tweeted on 19/11/13: "I need to start learning some lessons." Yes, Kerton, I think you do.

Kerton's "Fuck Wall":

"....fuck right off..."; "...fucking hell..."; "...cut it the fuck out..."; "What fucking morons...."; "...as thick as fuck..."; "I'm fucking sick of this..."; "...you're so fucking original..."; "...fuckity bye"; "...fuckin hilarious..."; "...Watch the Thick Fucks Fuck Up..." ( a particularly charming "double-header"); "...fucked uppy..."; "#fucking dire"; "..fuck off.."; "Oh do fuck off"; "#gofuckyourselves"; "...so fucking hopeless..."; "...what the fuck are..."; "...so fucking terrible..."; "then you're a shallow muppet who needs a fucking slap.."; "...the extra face orifice of his #fuckface"; "...if you know fuck all...".

ADDENDUM 31/08/14

Just checked on Twitter and the Paul Kerton @WLCTPaul account is still live and proudly bearing the Old Park Primary School Logo! Well that's Sandwell Labour for you!

THE SANDWELL SKIDDER - A COMMUNITY BLOG

e   thesandwellskidder@gmail.com                         t   @bcrover (Vernon Grant)

Confidential phone no:   07599 983737