STRONG WARNING - ADULTS ONLY - this blog contains accurate reportage of the writing of a former local journalist, Adam Smith, and contains VERY STRONG, OBSCENE, LANGUAGE. The wording reported is frequently HIGHLY OFFENSIVE - particularly to women. It is recommended that readers are 18+.
The most offensive words are shown here with an * but the original wording showed no such restraint.
This person's writing is of public interest due to his continuing political involvement with Sandwell Council on behalf of Labour Cllrs Carmichael (female), Hackett, Moore and others, his campaigns against former Sandwell Councillors, his attempts to prevent the publication of the Review of the Wragge Report, his support for Labour candidates such as John Tipper, and his involvement with numerous Sandwell Labour-supporting troll accounts on social media.
Addendum 23rd August, 2021 - Smith's vile response to this has been to publicly write that my wife has been having an affair! Also. Smith wrote for the North Birmingham charity as recently as 13th August, 2021! Certainly one to watch that!
Adam Smith was a puppet local journalist prepared to do the bidding of former West Brom East MP, Tom Watson, plus various Sandwell Labour Councillors eg. Hackett, Carmichael, Moore, Piper and, of course, ex-Cllr John Tipper. These local politicians sent Smith to spy on me and he used to meet me in a pub where he would try to ascertain how much I knew about matters involving his patrons.
At all material times, Smith was a notorious drunkard who was perpetually skint, and his cadging of drink and money is a standing joke on Facebook and Twitter. He is superficially amusing but it is never clear where the line is between fact and bullshit. Despite his regular inebriation he tells frequent tales of "f*cking birds" and "boffing bints".
Smith uses a relatively clean Twitter account in his own name but uses a second account in the name @SteveZacharanda for his most offensive material. Here he refers to women as c*nts, slags, bints, tw*ts and in other sexist terms. Incredibly, given what follows, he joined in the recent vicious campaign by Lisa McNally (the Director of Public Health) and others at bent Labour Council to brand ME a misogynst (which, I can tell you, was given very short shrift by a High Court Judge!)
He uses strangely archaic language in conjunction with his obscenities. He now seems to have a steady girlfriend whom, inevitably, he describes as his "Mrs" like the others (real or fictitious) who preceded her. Let's hope things work out better than in the past:
On rumours Aston Villa were to spend £24m on new players: "#avfc spending £24m. the mrs said she'd sleep wiv Brad Pitt for £1m. Potentially I'm loaded but in reality I live wiv a slag :)"
And: "Couldn't watch the footballing porn of Barcelona because I know I've got to face my big fat ugly #avfc slag of a Mrs on Saturday..."
Other women were subjected to his vile abuse such as Karen Brady: "karen brady 'i'm a businesswoman of the year and no-one has eva called me a bitch' err yeah right. 40' people call u a slag every week love"
Even automated female voices attract his ire: "would just like to vent my anger at HSBC for being complete cnts, i wasn't listening to the automated slag now my telephone banking is broke!"
Back in 2017 Smith was working at the mighty, er, Halesowen News when Boris Johnson visited their offices:
Perhaps it's just as well Boris hadn't noted his earlier comments about him (presumably given the appearance of a singer in the competition): "#eurovision where was Boris Johnson 20 years ago? f*cking some Serbian slag that's where"
Smith's Twitter feed is liberally littered with the word "f*ck" and whilst not an example of his appalling misogyny it is worth just mentioning a piece of his erudite Covid reportage. Like the teachers' unions, leftists and a few health "experts", Smith was keen to deprive kids of their education during Covid: "F*ck me Boris hates November doesn't he? Last year he saddled us with a general election and now this half arsed load of bollocks. If you're gonna do it, do it properly close the superspreading schools etc! More half arsed tittybabby twattery."
Women are "bints" - usually with another abusive description eg. "brainless bint"; "the french bint on Newsnight"; "the bint from the Railway Children" (!); "that Radio 4 bint"; "the BBC bint"; "this peace-nick bint"; "some bint in a burger van", "the poor bint", "the Truss bint", "that Welsh bint", "this [Ukrainian] bint", "a bint gets off the bus", "married to the bint who runs Google", "the new bint [who reads the football scores], "some bint", "the bint in the yellow dress", "posh bint", "the bint from Terminator", "Radio 5 bint", "a PR bint from London", "the daft bint", "that Cole bint", "some mad bint", "the old bint", "Who's this bint on ITV", "that ice skating bint", "a posh bint", "that footballer's bint", "that bint Florence" etc.
When Test Match Special employed the first female member of the commentary team Smith naturally branded her a "bint". Someone complained and he responded, "called her a bint last test and the earnest Twitter types bored me to death calling me a misogynist." I can't imagine why can you readers? "
Where there is sleaze there is ex-MP Tom Watson who took his lackey to a London bar: "mr @tomwatson took me there first, met couple of arty slebs before [Rachel Reid] walked in + befriended some Turkish bint!"
In the amoral world of Smith and Watson the former could slag off Max Mosley, "Fascist c*nt Oswald Moseley's [sic] son is going to have a say what is printed in this country. What the actual f*ck Sleepwalking into c*ntery!" Meanwhile his patron, Watson, was taking substantial donations from, er, Max Mosley!
Smith often writes about "birds" from "Just need a bird now ..." to strange commentary on TV programmes: "Blimey, how old was the bird in dungarees who got dragged on stage by two pimps!!"
In response to Tweet about women's underwear: "if a bird wrote that I might allow it, but a bloke tweeting about bras? WEIRDO"
More Covid reportage: "I reckon a few birds will tell men to isolate their cocks this weekend!"
In his weirdly archaic language he writes things like: "Is that the Northern Irish bird [a footballer] was biffing ..." and "look at that bird over there, I want to "Cock-her-in ...".
He informs us that "I really like the bird who works in my local Cash Converters ..." where he is no doubt a regular customer given his impecuniosity, but on his supposed dates he is pure charm, "not fan of phoning someone on 1st date, I only did when my mate assured me bird I was taking out was lovely after I'd met her with him pissed".
He moves in exalted circles and is something of a linguist: "I knew a bird who had 'bash it' in Chinese on her mound."
In another post he refers to "Some fat bird from Stoke".
Sometimes one gets the treat of a "bird" and a "mrs" together as when he compares two women in the Eurovision Song Contest as, "Young Helen Mirren dancing with that bird who used to be Phil Mitchell's mrs ..."
Smith not only likes to demean women but to patronise them too. When a "bird on the World Service" made a mistake in a piece about football he urged her to "get it right luv."
He chastised a friend/donor: "Kin hell, you could have mentioned I walked in with two birds!"
His dislike of nil-nil draws is matched with his distaste for women who, er, menstruate: "watching a shit duck egg draw and no shootout is like taking a fat annoying bird to dinner for her to say she has come on heavy at pudding"
Mention of New Hall by another Twitter-user brings the bragging response: "I've torn up some quim in New Hall :) Best days of my life"
Apparently his "PR" activities haven't always been successful: "client-rimming' fave new term , why my PR firm failed, need any contributions? I'm cheaper than a drunk whore who's rents due"
As a self-proclaimed "hack" he faced daily decisions such as, "which sounds worse 'child rapist' or 'pre-pubescent b*mmer' - the question of the day for me today"
In a resume of the budget the "award-winning" Journalist opined: "first they hike strongbow, christ they will be putting a levy on my other favourite past time, daydreaming about fresh snatch"
At times Smith gets positively Proustian, "just had a flashback from five years ago. Dancing to this choon in New York with A-class snatch!"
Smith's friend at bent Labour Sandwell Council, Cllr Bob "Seig Heil" Piper infamously abused Margaret Thatcher in her lifetime particularly her dementia and Smith marked her death with this tribute: "bet there is not so much vulnerable snatch at Maggie's funeral as at Diana's. I remember me and my mate were gonna go down on the pull."
In a particularly revolting effort Smith wrote, "'Why's that corpse got a shrimp sticking out of her fanny?' 'That's not a shrimp son, that's her clit.' Silence - 'taste likes a shrimp'"
Of course, Smith finds time to laugh at how "foreigners" speak and finds it hilarious when a Chinese man supposedly sings "Tits and fanny" instead of the real words to a Cliff Richard hit.
He also thought an Italian uncle would give his nephew the advice, "ayyy tell her your salami would smash her fanny in two!"
And he reported the words of the Perry Barr intelligentsia, "Look if you can't dance you can't f*ck properly ..."
At one point Smith fancied himself as Lennon and McCartney and gave the public his best lyric: "I'll lick your twat, I'll lick your twat, I'll be back for good". Happily Spotify are not yet inflicting this on us.
Before a Covid lockdown he suggested men use the following chat-up line, "Alright bab, can I lockdown your twat this weekend before the new rules on Tuesday come in ..."
Or chaps could try: "Well, hello ladies! Have you got car insurance! Cos I fancy road testing your twat tonight ..."
Back in the day, he retweeted this, adding his delight at the quote, "[a female journalist] manages to walk the difficult tightrope between being a bitch and a c*nt"
And way back he commented on that infamous Gordon Brown "bigot" incident: "bigot stuff was brilliant media storm but he didn't call her 'a silly old baggy fannied c*nt did he?"
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FURTHER CONTENT WARNING - this part of the post deals with Smith's attempts at literature which are, in reality, just filth and obscenity. 18+ only please.
The fantasist Smith laughably sees himself as a "gonzo" journalist (Google it) but actually used his position when he was working to try and scrounge freebies. This activity features in the writing of his alter ego, "Alex Anderson".
Alex shows his press card to a bouncer and says: "If you don't let me in this f*cking place within 10 seconds I'm gonna do a food review on this shithole saying that I found sp*nk in your rocket salad."
"Alex" exhorted readers who were unlikely to end a night-out with sexual intercourse to remember the old mantra, "get em drunk and touch em".
In an uncanny resemblance (lol) to Smith himself, "Alex" "didn't have any money until he had tapped up the owner for some cash."
He watched his girlfriend "wiggle past then slightly slapped her arse." "Alex" then met two mates, one with "a chocolate brown face".
The friends reminisced: "Oh I'm sorry for setting you up with a bird and letting you b*m her in my bed after 20 minutes ..." "Never without homemade porn on their mobiles" the attitude to women was "If it moves f*ck it."
A friend imagines being a woman and, inevitably, would be "a proper slag" "putting industrial equipment up my gash and trying to lick me tits."
"Alex" imagined "a cum-catching party". Don't ask, just don't ask. The friends went off through the crowd "touching bums".
The "fictional character" said to the owner he had written a piece about the joint in the paper and this "free advertising" merited a cash payment. And in Smith's fantasy world Alex gets the girl.
Some mate did a cartoon strip of "Alex" who presented as a hard-drinking, impecunious, journalist with a remarkable resemblance to Smith himself. The story ends, of course, with "Alex" having sexual intercourse in the office.
In a second piece of "writing" called 'The Conversation" the short effort contains such lines as, She's a f*cking slag ... she is making a twat out of you." Then "she has a beer and becomes a slag. And she scavs sniff then gets horny with whoever gives her a line." Jane Austen this ain't.
The character states the reasons he loves a woman including, "I love her snatch, her back gash ... her follow-on double blow jobs ... she coould have a shower of Rasta sp*nk for all I care, I'd still love her."
And finally we are reminded: "prostitutes are fannies to finger and arses to shag not shoulders to cry on."
In a second, charming, cartoon - with the words penned by Smith - one of two low life characters secures a windfall. He pays off his drug dealer and then the pair are pictured having oral sex with two "ho's".
And finally ...
In a rare moment of self-awareness Smith stated in 2019: "I'm not a journalist. Was gonna go to Glasgow to be one again but the Mrs wants me to stay in Brum and as u know, no f*cker will employ me in this town!"
But there is "always one" and a woman (yes!) called Claire Marshall employed him this time last year. Who she? An arts person who has set up a labour propaganda outfit in North Birmingham under the auspices of a charity. In August, 2020 Smith announced that he was Chief Reporter on Marshall's "paper" - a strange choice, noting the above, given the legal charitable status of the "paper" and that Marshall herself claims to be the governor of two schools. But Smith has gone very quiet about this appointment and Marshall is equally reluctant to comment - declining to respond to a written question from The Skidder. What's going on?
Smith has been desperately trying to get work as some sort of PR for the disastrously costly Commonwealth Games. Perhaps there is someone out there who wants to commission a "blue" commentary on the female competitors? the weight-lifting won't be the only sport which features "the snatch".
As we have seen, local Labour politicians in Sandwell are still using Smith as their mouthpiece despite his appalling output. Curiously a number of male journalists - including the only good one in Brum - like him and so we must assume that they too approve of the sort of vile misogyny set out above. Some see him as a maverick but in the words of the man himself, "one man's maverick is another's piss taking twat ..."
(Note: The Skidder team hold screenshots of all of the above posts).
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